Does anybody know what this said?! I’m having the same problem!

Edit: nevermind, I figured it out.

Yeah, high school is some of the worst times in my life. If my kid complained, I wouldn’t say “it only gets worse,” I’d say “this is a rough time, but remember, none of the stuff that is hard is real. It’s all just training. The school stuff is training you for deadlines and heavy workloads. The social stuff is training for personal and professional relationships. Try to think of this as the tutorial for life, where you must do X action to proceed, and maybe it’s hard because it’s new, and it’s frustrating because you don’t realize it’s a tutorial and think “this is the game.” It’s not. It becomes an open-world game after this. It’s harder, but it can be WAY better, and you have a lot more control.”

Also, telling a depressed person their answer is to exercise is like telling a homeless person that they just need to get a job. The not having a home prevents the getting a job. If they had the ability to find a job, they wouldn’t be homeless (except obviously the people who don’t make enough from their job to support themselves, but that’s a whole different issue that shouldn’t exist).

So even if someone does have the time, getting the depression under control may be necessary before the exercise seems like a reasonable possibility.

My parents were wonderful, so I have no real complaints, but my father had a weird quirk. Tools, equipment, whatever that he had interest and purchased himself were “his.” I mean, obviously, but he would use the possessive when referring to those things.

“You have to prime my lawnmower first before you try to start it.” “Go and get my ladder.” Never the ladder, always my ladder. I never questioned it (because I didn’t care), but when I was a teenager I started noticing it and it was odd. Like he was establishing that the lawn mower or the ladder or whatever didn’t belong to the household, they were his. And nothing seemed to get him worked up more than a neighbor borrowing something and taking more than a day or so to return it.

I bought a laptop backpack a loooooooong time ago, and still use it constantly. It’s been through 3 laptops, and I’m not the type to upgrade until it is absolutely necessary.

I just started playing Magic the Gathering, and my Command Deck I just bought came before my box, sleeves, or dice.

I thought there was going to be a game last night at my local bar, and I was about to recreate this comic (except with the cardboard box it came in instead of a sock).

Me at my house:

Daughter: “I don’t know where my phone is”

Me: I don’t say it.

Daughter: “DAD, I can’t find my phone!”

Me: I still don’t say it.

Daughter: Daaaaaad, do you know where my phone is?!"

Me: deep breath

He has a bunch of random songs about random stuff. One of my other favorites is “I don’t work here” and it’s all about people assuming he works where he’s at (grocery store, lifeguard post…) and it gets more and more absurd as the song goes on.

I’d recommend his YouTube channel, most of his stuff is pretty good.

Tom Cardy - Active Perception Check

It gets stuck in my head a lot and I end up just putting it on.

Also maybe Skrillex - Bangarang

Because my go-to thing is when I’m in the kitchen with my wife and daughter I’ll yell “ALEXA! PLAY BANGARANG!” And everyone groans. And then we listen to EDM for as long as it takes for them to leave me to work in the kitchen alone.

How to Train Your Dragon Trilogy.

I watched the first one on a ferry, and just hearing the title made me think it was going to be some nonsense. And then it was amazing.

Then they announced a second, and I was thinking what do they expect to do with this and then they gave something intensely heartwarming and heart wrenching. I found it better and deeper than the first.

And then the third. I don’t think it was as clean as the other two, but it closed it off so beautifully I was bawling at the end. Absolutely perfect.

Seriously. I was like "okay, Brazil is in the right general area, but obviously the wrong shape. Argentina is definitely not there. Chile is along the coast, so I’ll allow it. I honestly couldn’t say what all the northern countries are, and… wait, what the hell is the north connecting to, that looks like the middle east.

Jesus Christ, that’s Africa."

Kind of limits their upward mobility, I would imagine.

And I absolutely intended the double entendre, because I can see how that could limit the ability to get into more executive positions, if the ceo or vp is required to come to the ground floor in order to talk to them, instead of two doors down the hall.

I’m a man, and that’s how I feel about boxers and being nude. I don’t like that dangle feel of uncontrolled swaying on a sensitive part.

I’ve seen stuff like that on helmets, but not flight suit. My service is pretty strict on what you can put on flight suits, though. Helmets (while still against the rules) are generally acceptable as long as they are not inappropriate.

Especially hot sauce. I missed that the cap wasn’t closed on some… I think Sriracha, and ended up pepper spraying myself. The waitress was very concerned.

BTW, actually getting pepper sprayed is MUCH worse. Getting bear sprayed is worse and also disgusting, because on top of the pain and misery, it also has a really gross musk stank. It took A LOT of washes with vinegar to get the smell out of the clothes I was wearing.

Do not recommend getting spicy stuff of any kind in the eyes.

“It has a smooth finish, virtually indestructible, and it writes upside-down.” [None of these will be true] “Also, with our Ink Anytime subscription service, you’ll never run out of ink! It’s free…” [for the first six months] “for our lowest tier…” [three lines of text per day] “with an option to upgrade to a higher tier anytime.” [Puts pen in pocket] “We’re offering pre-orders with a $5 non-refundable deposit, with delivery expected sometime in the next six months depending on how soon you get on the waitlist.” [Two years until you give up and just let us keep your deposit] “So sign up now!”

The amount of people with no kids that have strong opinions about how children should be raised is like the people with no uteruses that have strong feelings about abortion and pregnancy, or white college kids who have strong opinions about what words and phrases should be offensive to minorities. There’s nothing wrong with having an opinion, but the arrogance to think they have something to contribute to that conversation is exhausting.

Like… tables?

Yes to all except jiggy. I feel like that was just Will Smith trying to make Fetch happen.

Oh, no, I get that, I’m just saying those things make him annoying. It gives lots of opportunity for character development, but he’s still annoying until he develops.