And I know we’re mostly atheists here, but please keep the theological discussion to a minimum and appreciate the lighthearted hypothetical scenario for what it is.
I might as well go first:
Thou shalt seed what you download (You’ll understand in a few thousand years)
Sharing is caring !
That’s why I seed my neighbour’s wife.
The five missing ones are:
- Acknowledge the central point.
- Thou shalt not soapbox.
- Thou shalt not decontextualise what others say.
- Thou shalt not claim intentions to defend thine or someone else’s actions.
- Thou shalt not convey “I disagree” through feigned lack of understanding.
Bonus: the original version of the 8th was
- Thou shalt not claim with certainty things that you do not know for certain.
The current 8th (Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour) is a forgery. Some assumer got called out over and over because of the older 8th, since he really liked to make shit up, so he restricted it into near uselessness. Source: I’m Lucifer, I know it. :^)
- Do not treat people or animals as things
- Consent first from others, especially your family
- The Earth and it’s creatures should be shepherded and guarded, not exploited
- No gods, no kings, no rulers - instead have empathy, sharing, and collaboration
- It’s round you nimrods, because that’s how gravity works
The 10 commandments divide into two sections. Rules for the relation between people and God and rules for the relation between people and other people. 5 more would probably setup a third section. Like rules for the relation between people and nature or rules for one’s relation to oneself.
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Forgive your brother who has wronged you as you would want him to forgive your own transgressions.
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Honor creation and take only what you need from the mountains, streams, woodlands, and valleys.
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Respect the creatures of the earth as your brothers in creation.
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Avoid excesses and live humbly
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Love yourself for you were created in My image
- Love yourself for you were created in My image
- But not like that.
- No, not like that either…
- Listen you little shit, if I catch you doing that again I’ll come down from this cloud and seduce your wife as a swan.
- Ignore copyright laws that haven’t been invented yet and don’t tell Zeus…
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“No slavery”, “no genocide”, “no slavery”, “no genocide”, and “seriously, no slavery or genocide”.
Considering that early Jewish writings directly contain laws about the treatment of slaves, “no slavery” was probably not on the list.
As for Genocide, Yahweh commanded Saul through Samuel:
And Samuel said to Saul, "The Lord sent me to anoint you to be king over His people, over Israel; and now hearken to the voice of the words of the Lord.
…
Now, go, and you shall smite Amalek, and you shall utterly destroy all that is his, and you shall not have pity on him: and you shall slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.And then Yahweh threw a hissy fit when Saul showed some mercy. Turns out that Yahweh was is a dick, according to his own believers’ writings.
To be fair, Samuel had tried to convince the people of Israel not to do the king thing in the first place. See 1 Samuel 8:10-22.
And he said, This will be the manner of the king that shall reign over you:
He will take your sons, and appoint them for himself, for his chariots, and to be his horsemen; and some shall run before his chariots. […] And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cooks, and to be bakers.
And he will take your fields, and your vineyards, and your oliveyards, even the best of them, and give them to his servants. And he will take the tenth of your seed, and of your vineyards, and give to his officers, and to his servants. And he will take your menservants, and your maidservants, and your goodliest young men, and your asses, and put them to his work. He will take the tenth of your sheep: and ye shall be his servants.
And ye shall cry out in that day because of your king which ye shall have chosen you; and the Lord will not hear you in that day.
Nevertheless the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel; and they said, Nay; but we will have a king over us; that we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles.
Only 10% taxes?
Doesn’t sound like such a bad deal maybe.Anyway, at least some of the USA founding fathers were just as down on the idea of political parties as Samuel was on kings here. I think they were right.
“PM Netanyahu invokes ‘Amalek’ theory to justify Gaza killings.”
He actually quoted this a few weeks back…
