For your first story, I’m having trouble picturing it. How many lanes were in that road? Was it a “one lane each direction” deal, so when you “pulled out to pass them” you crossed a dashed yellow line into the oncoming lane?

What a terrifying situation. I’ve seen some bad drivers, but that driver must have been on another level.

I have no words for your second story. Such a tragic situation that could’ve wound up even worse in so many fucked up ways.

the sensory nightmare of a ring on my finger

I feel vindicated to read this. If I’m wearing a ring (or a bracelet) I can’t just let it sit on my hand - best case scenario, it becomes a fidget toy I constantly fiddle with, but that I’m also anxious about losing and/or breaking (especially if it’s expensive.) Such a small thing dominates way too much of my attention.

I curse the zeitgeist for making “Jewelry is a perfect default gift for every woman” a thing. Add in having sensitive skin that reacts to impurities in metal, and I have way too much jewelry that I never wear.

As someone currently avoiding processed foods, I miss pizza.

I miss my girlfriend too, sure, but I can call her anytime. As to pizza? I don’t know when I’ll get to indulge in that again.

Absence truly does make the heart grow fonder.

When I meet someone new, I straight-up say, “I apologize in advance for forgetting your name.” It usually gets a chuckle, and an admittance that they’ll probably forget my name, too.

Which is great, because then neither of us feels embarrassed when the inevitable moment comes.

I don’t appreciate being called out like this. Especially that last line. I’ve been expecting to die soon for nearly 30 years now and for some reason I’m still chugging along. Wtf.

Aaaand that is why tickling me puts me into “fight or flight panic mode.” Well, that plus ticklers who hear you laughingly say, “Stop!” but because you’re laughing, they don’t take you seriously and keep going until you lash out violently…

Fuck, I hate being tickled.

Your last sentence is exactly the sentiment that all those other messages are trying to avoid evoking. Now I have to explore this rabbit hole. What have you done?!‽

This is relatable and I hate it.

The amount of weed I smoke. Teenage-me was still in the process of deprogramming from D.A.R.E. propaganda. She wouldn’t have expected to become a full-blown stoner in her 30s.

I’ve always had a strong memory, and unfortunately it feeds into my anxiety and depression. Weed definitely impacts my memory, but it’s a benefit - normally, all the stupid little things of the day would torture me. I’d be overanalyzing every word I said, worrying over social mistakes that nobody else even remembers happening. It’s a mental process that only serves to hurt me, and that I raw-dogged sober for most of my life. Weed lets me break that cycle, change my focus, and not remember all the dumb little details that don’t actually matter, but that would otherwise keep me awake at night.

As a teen, I would’ve struggled to understand that there could be benefits to marijuana. She would’ve just thought the self-torture was normal. Life’s weird like that sometimes.

I haaaate how people dismiss those of us who have less visible struggles. In particular, it upsets me the way intelligent autistic kids are expected to have all their shit together, just because they talk like little professors. Intelligence and emotional maturity are two completely different things. A little kid can be brighter than all the adults around them, but that doesn’t mean they can regulate themselves like a neurotypical adult can.

No wonder so many of us grow up to feel like imposters - ever since childhood, other people put high expectations on us based on one aspect, then get upset at us when we fail to master everything. I’ve worked with kids of this type as well, and it’s disappointing how many times I’ve heard coworkers go, “They’re so smart! Why are they even here (at a school specifically for autistic kids with behavior issues)?” Short answer: because there’s a lot more to school-readiness than wanting to learn. Lacking the social skills to tolerate classmates, and having those situations trigger behaviors that can cause injury to themselves and others, is not conductive to a traditional school environment.

I had to raw-dog that experience in my own childhood in the 90s, when few people would’ve expected a little girl to be autistic (let alone a bright girl who loved rambling about science.) I had to learn socialization the hard way, after years of screaming, crying, throwing chairs, getting detention, and the only help I ever got was being told to “just ignore” my bullies. Thank goodness there are more services and knowledge available today to help such kids. Unfortunately, we still have quite a ways to go toward having “invisible” disabilities be understood and accepted, even by those who specialize in working with such individuals. Sigh…

Similarly, legalizing gay marriage was supposed to usher in waves of people wanting to marry animals or something.

I can’t imagine not masking at work. It’s so ingrained that I don’t know what “not masking” in a professional setting would even look like. When I’m alone I don’t mask, obviously, but when I’m alone I’m also not talking to anyone. So there’s no facial expression or tone of voice to monitor.

I’ve had way, way too many bad experiences related to not masking. Too much punishment, too many baseless accusations, too many authority figures confusing flat tones of voice with “sarcasm” or “rudeness.” The idea of not masking in a professional setting is as scary as showing up to work naked.

It’s cool that some people are finding ways to reduce masking, but I can’t fathom what I could do instead. From what I’ve experienced, the world still isn’t ready for full autism acceptance.

And the account was made 3 days ago. Ugh, to the block list they go.

You say it’s not relevant to the joke, but a realistic reflection wouldn’t show a side-by-side depiction. The way it’s portrayed here highlights the hair cut that the animal is upset about, which is key to the joke.

It might not be realistic, but I see this as “artistic license,” along with the other absurd elements.

A varied diet provides protein as well.

Science time! Proteins are made up of amino acids. Certain chains of amino acids form “complete proteins,” which are what most people think of as “protein.” However, the constituent amino acids connect with each other in our bodies even if they’re obtained from different sources. So two sources of “incomplete” proteins can still provide “complete proteins” if both are consumed. Which means it’s a lot easier to get your protein from a varied, vegan diet than most people might think.

Incomplete vs complete proteins on WebMD.

It’s also not how “1/2 off” cuts work, animals don’t go to a barber, nor do they talk.

But the reflection being unrealistic, yes, that’s where we draw the line.

I’m not the OP, I’m not the one talking about child-marriage. Thus why I’m basing my distaste for fundies on the things I said above.

Okay okay, message received. I’ll just stick to being upset at fundamentalist Christians for indoctrinating children, inhibiting their ability to develop critical thinking skills, sowing hatred and fear, and for holding disproportionate power in politics that drags back science and cultural progress for everyone.

You’re absolutely right. I didn’t have that kind of insight at 19, but I’ve learned to recognize people like that in the years since. Which is great, because I definitely don’t have the patience for that nonsense anymore.

I had a coworker like this. Always asking me for advice, then going out and doing the opposite. At every turn, she asked me what she should do, and at every turn, she did something else.

She ended up cheating on her husband by going after an ex who had just got out of prison. It was at that point where I (metaphorically) threw my hands in the air and was done. I’m not going to keep wasting my energy trying to help someone who insists on ignoring me and making stupid decisions all the time. She clearly had her mind already made up, there’s no need to drag me into it.