Whillikers! It’s so big.

I wrote mobile apps for Blackberry back in the day. As part of their security fixation, all library modules you incorporated had to be signed as your app was compiling, even if you were just testing out a single line change. This could make your app take upwards of a whole hour to sign, if the signing servers were even up and running at all; they were often down completely which meant I could go home and get high instead of working. Which is why I never badmouthed Blackberry to my bosses.

The absurdity of having every module signed meant that I had to think long and hard about whether I wanted to use built-in library functionality or just roll my own code. For one UI I needed to use trigonometry functions. These were located (logically or not) in one of the encryption modules which were especially prone to taking a long time to sign, so I ended up writing my own sin()function (in Java) just to save myself ten minutes of compilation time.

C’mon, killing off Newt and Hicks at the start of the third was unconscionable. It’s in the same category as “somehow, Palpatine returned”.

Alien at least had the second film better than the first, which was a hell of an accomplishment since the first film was great. Fortunately they never even made any movies after the second one.

I would’ve upvoted you, but …

Reminds me of “yellow snowcone” from the first Jackass movie.

Why do I always think Goatse is the guy who did “Somebody That I Used to Know”?

We shouldn’t let men who constantly lie about what 9 inches looks like be the ones measuring insulation in the attic?

You must watch Cy Porter.

It’s funny, but there has long been a paradigm in programming called test-driven development or TDD. The idea is that you have a small number of experienced developers who write a suite of tests that an application has to pass, and then you let an army of newbies write whatever the hell they feel like writing and if their code passes the tests it goes into the application (somewhat snarky summary but not entirely). In my experience it does not produce solid applications but a large fraction of the programming world swears by it. I’ve always thought that the construction analog of TDD would be letting a bunch of inexperienced workers build houses and then the experienced contractors drive around in bulldozers knocking down anything that happens to not be built well enough.

From the river to the C

My favorite:

for (int i = myArray.Length; i --> 0; )
{
    //do something
}

Perfectly valid in C-style, even if it does look a bit puzzling at first.

Only tangentially related, but: I’ve always wanted to see a mashup of “Firestarter” and Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire”.

Where I live there’s a blind turn and sometimes when I drive around it I come upon a bunch of crows standing in the middle of the road and they have to scatter to avoid being run over. There is never anything in the road there, so I assume they are playing chicken with cars.

On the other hand: Kimbra.

“THE JACKPOT IS UP TO 30-MILLION NOW! YOU BETTER GET A TICKET! YA CAN’T WIN IF YA DON’T PLAY!”

I join in the lottery pools at work, not because I think we’ll win, but because I can’t bear to imagine the horror of having everybody at work win the fucking lottery but me.

I’ve had exactly one gambling experience in my life. I went with some friends to a casino in Louisiana and I tried a slot machine. I stuck my credit card in the slot, was debited $5, pushed the “lever” button, and won exactly bupkis. I don’t know what the appeal is but I imagine it involves winning occasionally. I’m going to stick with my 0.000 batting average and be happy.

I’ll give it a try, but … jeez.

I make bread and pizza dough with honey or molasses instead of sugar and it’s fantastic. Honey is always better than sugar – except in coffee.

One of the plots in Dune was the idea that Baron Harkonnen initially put the Beast Raban in charge of Arrakis so that he could be a huge dick and make everybody hate him, then he would be replaced by Feyd-Rautha whom everybody would love because he was slightly less of a huge dick. Trump and Vance.

Just a reminder that ICE vans do have catalytic converters.