

me being autistic at the same time not knowing that was looked down upon: you gonna finish your fries??
I’m back on my bullshit.
me being autistic at the same time not knowing that was looked down upon: you gonna finish your fries??
yoooo, my first adult bed, furniture set, and laptop were from the trash. rich kids in college towns throw out the best stuff. it was a Compaq, and the only problem was overheating because it needed that heat sink lube.
Is asking questions about basic things an ADHD thing? I thought it was an autism thing.
I swear, we are the ultimate scapegoats for bullies. I’ve been going through a similar experience for a while. It’s like people try to find anything that they can criticize and use it to shame me rather than have an open and forthcoming discussion to address it. Being autistic, we’re always guessing how to do things in a world where everyone else knows the rules, which are meant to be followed, and which are meant to be violated.
Au: You’re violating a rule.
NT 1: Yeah, but it’s okay. It’s not a big deal because it doesn’t harm anyone and everyone else is doing it.
Au: violates rule and gets caught because they thought that’s normal and expected
NT 2: That is a rule. Why did you violate it?
Au: Because it doesn’t harm anyone and everyone else is doing it
NT 1 & 2: So now you’re snitching too?
Here’s another one. You learn a rule and apply it in the situation you learned it. However, you didn’t know it was applicable in other similar situations, so you don’t apply it. People get upset with you because they have seen you apply it in the first situation, so you “should have known” and therefore need to be punished. 😮💨
I don’t care how you walk, talk, or breathe. You be you. Don’t accept other people’s shame being dumped on you. If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, tell them that you don’t like what they do that makes you feel bad. If they keep doing it, stop being around them as much as possible. It’s not your responsibility to help others process their shame. You are your main responsibility and already working with a disadvantage. Make sure you’re okay ❤️
I would censor the work f–k because it might come off like you’re being passive aggressive and aren’t really trying. Reminds of the time the actor that played Burke on Grey’s Anatomy called the actor that played George a fa—t, then made a public apology saying he’s sorry he called him a fa—t and that he wont say fa—t again, except he said the word. People got even more pissed, and I think he was fired from the show. 🤦
I previously made a comment on how I’ve learned to apologize if you’re interested.
“the sticks” doesn’t mean poor
Is there an informal term that would describe poor rural neighborhoods similar to ghetto/barrio?
When you’re poor, everything smells like whatever’s on sale.
That’s right!! For me, it was like whatever I had that was nice. If someone got me a nice shirt, I would protect that shirt and only wear it to special events that I knew would not place the shirt in any danger (physical activity, stains from cooking or painting, etc.). I kind of still do that and have a few shirts that are ~20 years old, a backpack that is 23 years old, and a multi-tool that’s about 21 yrs old. Never though that was associated with growing up poor, but it makes sense now.
Yooooo, I needed to hear a few of those. Thank you very much!
Same, but I didn’t marry them. I became nearly completely useless. Lost almost all friends, hobbies, work, goals, dreams, and even desire. I couldn’t recognize myself in the mirror. Coming back has been incredibly difficult since I didn’t trust anyone to guide me nor myself. How do you get somewhere without direction? Lately, I think I’m on the right track, but I will never be my old self and that’s okay. My old self got me in that situation, so the new one will be better.
Below are three songs that I found validating during these times. Two are in English and one is in Spanish. If you don’t speak Spanish, I would happily translate the lyrics for you; just let me know.
Ren and Chinchilla
The Big Push
Residente
Thank you very much!
I’ve heard that people use snow tires. How does that work? Does everyone have 2 sets of wheels at home that they switch with the seasons?
thank you!
The ‘do you mind’ question a great example of why many neurodivergent people have such a hard time in social settings, keeping track of all of the contradictory social expectations that don’t make sense is tiring and not everyone is consistent.
Yes! Thank you very much. It’s at least a triple-effect because (1) we get confused about what the response means so we have to focus on solving the riddle, (2) solving the riddle consumes more mental energy so we have less in reserve, and (3) we miss out on everything that occured while we were figuring out the riddle so we have to catch up when we already run slower.
Thanks for the help! I can understand it retrospect, but in the moment, I will be unsure and request confirmation. It’s just how it is 🤷
What does that mean about your preference with the use of “do you mind”-like questions?
I dont think I’ve ever looked at them
Mannnnn, I would be the same way. That whole seeing people cut open is hard enough. I can’t imagine seeing someone I care about anesthetized, cut open, and then their insides. I rather continue my delusion that their insides look like a mix of their outsides and their personality.
Pedants: He asked if she minded. She responded saying, “Sure thing,” which is an affirmative response, meaning that she did mind. He still attempted to use the bathroom despite her saying she was uncomfortable with that.
I have difficulty with interactions in which people use “do you mind” that I have to be extra clear. Anyone else?
lol yeah, the grey sticky stuff 😋