Oh I’m well aware. Unfortunately I have far more control over how useful I am than how annoying I am 😅

Be slightly more useful than I am annoying… I’m really fucking annoying

Just want to let you know that you aren’t alone. I have talked to a number of women who advocate for things like DEI and acceptance (which is something I also believe quite strongly in) but often default to preferring more traditional gender norms in dating. When pressed on the issue (not like I’m interrogating them just through normal conversations and getting to know them) they will inevitably say that it is ultimately “just their preference”.

What I find so odd about that “preference” is if a man behaves in accordance with the traditional/societal gender norms in the beginning of the courting process, why is it surprising that they do the same thing later in the relationship when it comes to sharing emotional labor or various types of household chores?

I know the below is taking it to a bit of an extreme example but that behavior and “preference” often reminds me the sentiment “the only moral abortion is my abortion”. Like I get it, there are a lot of shitty people out there who have no interest in putting in the effort, and they absolutely are not worth the time and effort, but when you do meet someone who is willing to put in that effort, it isn’t really fair to treat them like all those other people.

This is what truly pisses me off about Google/Alphabet bitching about Apple not supporting RCS. Google does not offer any kind of API or access for developers to hook into RCS messaging and the have structured it in such a way with extensions to the standard that are Google only so even if there were other RCS providers it wouldn’t be fully compatible. Fuck.

The issue I have run into a lot is that they have the “wrong” kind of experience. Somewhat inline with the adage “practice doesn’t make perfect, perfect practice makes perfect”. I spent a lot of my teens and 20s being introspective, working on myself, and becoming the kind of person I would want to date. A lot of people I have had experiences with in my 30s spent a lot of that time in bad relationships creating reactive responses to various things rather than addressing the core issues or learning how to, and as a result they often have a lot of “bad habits” or expectations going into dating or future relationships.

I have met more than one person that has said they need someone who can be patient with them while they heal and deal with their past, while also not necessarily wanting to, or being capable of, providing that same level of patience and understanding to a partner. That seems…uhhh not really appropriate or fair? But I’m the one that’s been single for quite a while, sooooo it’s just as likely I could be the one with my head so far up my ass I can taste my tonsils.

Not OP, but I was sterilized in my mid 20s. Not only am I not interested in having kids, but I would not be a good parent. I have still dated people with kids who made it clear there would never be an expectation that I become a parent or interact with their kids, which does address those issues, but there are others. Understandably their kids take priority over basically everything except for maybe the factors that effect their ability to provide for their kids (or at least I think they should). That often means they don’t have nearly as much time to hang out and build a connection, nor are they able to be as free to do other things due to constraints on their time, finances, or both like going on fun trips. Another factor I have run into that is that usually the reason someone is single and has kids due to entirely positive reasons, and there is often at least some amount of trauma in their past that is often not entirely behind them.

To be clear the above is in no way an absolute and are merely my anecdotal experience and correlations in the given area I live. It is also always worth keeping in mind that I am in no way perfect myself and that it’s possible there is something about me that results in the above being my experience.

When not even my closest coworkers or boss could tell if I was working or screwing off because working on or doing research for my personal projects is indistinguishable from my work ones 😅

I don’t know if this is an option, I didn’t see you explicitly mention that it wasn’t so I thought I would mention something a little different that I have personally done when I wanted what you are talking about on the cheap.

Have you considered combining over the ear hearing protection ear muffs with a pair of standard (non-ANC) ear buds? A pair of earmuffs with a noise reduction of 30dB (which I believe is better than ANC can achieve can generally be had for $25-$35 leaving you with $70 to spend on a pair of ear buds where the only consideration is audio quality and fit at that price point.

Having sensory issues myself I think it’s worth noting that these types of ear muffs are designed to apply more pressure around your ears than standard head phones. It’s usually not an issue for me, but there are those who do not like it for long periods of time.

If memory serves, the bump from a “standard” new video game costing $50 to $60 happened around 2010. Accounting for inflation that $60 is a little over $70, so it doesn’t seem entirely unreasonable for them to be $70 even if I don’t like it.

Small correction it’s technically an LSposed/Exposed module, but everything I said previously still applies.

https://github.com/wanam/YouTubeAdAway

If you have a rooted phone and Magisk there is a module that essentially turns the stock YouTube app into the Premium version without adds and background play enabled.

It might be a bit overboard, but I have a Redmine instance running on my NAS that can likely do everything you want. Some out if the box, some with plugins. It’s pretty nice. If you don’t want to worry about installing it you can download a complete installer from Bitnami.

There is more to it than though, that’s why being able to explore profiles is important. You can see the questions they answered and how which allows you to make decisions and inferences. Sure it had flaws, but it was leaps and bounds better than anything today including it’s own current iteration. The closest is probably Hinge, but even that is Tinderfied.

Been using OkC for almost that long on and off now. The quizzes and questions still exist, but they have been tokenized since OkC now shows you people the same way Tinder does and doesn’t have any ability to explore people and profiles the way you used to be able to back in the date. It’s so frustrating!

I have been eyeing that model for a while now, nice to have some additional confirmation about it. Thanks!

What is the model of spectrophotometer that you bought?

Researching anything that happened on the internet right now in the future is going to be absolute hell considering how much useful user information and interactions are “locked” behind Discord. Is there a term for something worse than link rot? With link rot it’s a case of a known unknown. With information on Discord it’s an unknown unknown.

It would be really nice to have a parametric 3D modeling software solution that was on the same level as Blender or KiCAD. Every time I try FreeCAD I end up moping out pretty quickly.

Why pay? I think the answer is pretty easy. If one doesn’t want to self host. Running any kind of web based service costs the person running it money. Google obviously makes money off of a user doing searches via adds and data collection. I would actually have no issue paying for certain Google services if it meant that as a paying customer they would not double dip and try and profit off the data they are collecting on me.

This is all coming from a person who has a server rack in my basement and multiple PCs scattered throughout my home, so I am no stranger to self hosting.

Since the acronym for sociopath is ASPD, I will often respond with something like “nuh uh, mine has one less letter”. Pretty niche, but when someone gets it, so good.